"I was working in the lab late one night, when my eyes beheld an eerie sight ..."

— Bobby "Boris" Pickett

Are you ready for Saturday night? That's when 80,000 little Michael Jacksons will be wandering the suburbs of America begging for Butterfingers.

There's something cute and yet ghoulish about that, as Halloween approaches and we must get used to more dead celebrities filling the growing closet of spooky and topical outfits.

Obama masks and Sara Palin wigs are bound to still be popular.

But the ascension of MJ as a godlike tortured soul who died too soon will have a whole lot of kids — and I suspect older 'children' — decked out in black curly wigs, red leather jackets, tight short black pants and sequined gloves.

Whether it's appropriate or acceptable or respectable, the fact is that Michael Jackson is destined to take over the top spot in dead celebrity for Halloween getups, grabbing the crown from the King, Elvis Presley.

The fact that Jackson played a zombie in his famous video — perhaps the most famous video of all time — clinches it.

Don't feel sorry for Elvis though, because he will always have a following. Forever, dead or alive.

Michael Jackson, and another recent celebrity who died earlier this year, Farrah Fawcett, are listed on several most popular Halloween costume lists this fall.

This shouldn't be a shock considering their notoriety and the unique look each possessed while among us, although Michael had several unique looks as he evolved — or as some believe, devolved.

Other top costumes for 2009 include: Transformers, Wolverine, ninjas, Spider-Man, Jason, Terminator, and vampires, vampires, vampires.

There will also be plenty of the standards roaming the sidewalks with open bags: Pirates, princesses, devils, witches, cowboys and ghosts.

About.com's top costume list includes MJ in the top spot, followed by Harry Potter, the Vampire, Miley Cyrus, Star Trek, a Vombie, G.I. Joe Ninja, Hermione Granger and more.

I think Halloween is so popular because it's the one night we can be whatever we want to be, from a president to a dead pop star. And how can you beat free candy?

It's staying power may also have to do with a relaxing of the rules, at least for one night.

Think about this sick irony: Freddy Krueger masks for little children remain insanely popular, yet this infamous movie character was a child molester and murderer.

Talk about a nightmare on Elm Street.

In my formative years, I played the entire cast of usual characters. I was a pirate, ghost, gladiator, skeleton, doctor, Batman, Spider-Man, grave digger, knight, fireman and more. My favorite was the year I got to dress up like a cowboy, complete with dual holsters and a pair or shiny six-shooters. That was a cool outfit.

Some adults have taken the creation of Halloween outfits to dizzying heights, and been rewarded for their work. Years ago, when the Statue of Liberty was undergoing some major repair work, a young woman in New York went to a Halloween party dressed as Lady Liberty herself, complete with the scaffolding and tiny workmen. She took home the trophy for best costume.

You can be clever and have fun when coming up with a costume, even at the last minute.

One of my favorite throw-together outfits was the year I went to a party dressed as a vacationing proctologist, complete with islander straw hat, gaudy red Hawaiian shirt, khaki shorts and sandals, oversized sunglasses dangling from peeper keepers and, of course, an ample supply of latex gloves.

If you're really in a pinch, you can always use a large black plastic garbage bag and go as a giant raisin. Cut out two holes for the your legs, pull it on like a body stocking and you're good to go.

Here's to enjoying the cavity-prone holiday. If you're out and about Saturday night, drive slow and keep an eye out for miniature Michaels.

Boo!

That is all.

— John Charles Robbins can be reached at 272-6122 or jcr800@gmail.com.