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Let’s talk about sex
Dec 01, 2012 | 2958 views | 5 5 comments | 7 7 recommendations | email to a friend | print

We doubt there is a shorter path to poverty than to have a child as a teenager. But even that can be quickened with the addition of a second or perhaps a third child.

All the statistics testify to the same future: When teenage girls become pregnant, their odds of an education and a career are greatly diminished and their children join in suffering the consequences of impending and pervasive poverty. Don’t depend on Dad because he won’t be around. The grandparents will join in raising the children. And perhaps worst of all, the innocent newborns will most likely be next in this lengthening line to a life of less.

Is there anything more selfish than a child having a baby?

Yet in Robeson County, it happens all the time as we rank 11th in the state in the rate of teenage mothers. During 2011, 355 girls in Robeson County changed their first soiled diaper.

If there is good news, it’s hard to find, but we will go with this: The rate has been declining in recent years, and Bill Smith, the director of the county Health Department, is convinced that is because of outreach programs that focus more on prevention and less on the folly that teenagers can be talked out of having sex.

Yet in Robeson County, fixed as we are in the middle of the Bible Belt, our strategy has been to cross our fingers and look away and pretend that our children’s hormones will keep themselves in check. Sex education in schools has focused on abstinence, with educators saying this is a subject that is best broached at home, except that isn’t happening — at least not with the desired results.

In an ideal world, one that doesn’t exist, that is how it would be done. Parents would sit down with their children as they near puberty, have an honest discussion about sex, highlight the benefits of waiting — and then pound home the consequences of not doing so, which for the girls is to buy baby formula instead of a prom dress.

But too often that doesn’t happen, which is why comprehensive sex education is needed in our schools. Instead our school board has decided that sex education should be steered more toward abstinence, and less toward contraception, the threat of STD’s and the consequences of becoming a mother or a father while in high school or even middle school.

There is a chasm between an abstinence-only approach and handing out free condoms, but that ground hasn’t been sufficiently explored because the conversation is just too uncomfortable.

It seems clear to us that this county’s approach hasn’t work historically — in 2008 Robeson County’s rate of teen mothers was No. 2 in North Carolina — and if the tide has been stemmed out all, it is because of a slight shift toward a more comprehensive approach that comes from outside the halls of our schools.

We can continue doing as we have done, and we all know what that guarantees — that we continue to raise generations of children who are born into a world with a pretty sorry hand to play.

What could be more unfair?



Comments
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ROSSisRIGHT
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December 01, 2012
Make it a crime to have a kid you can't afford. Poor.... again doing everything wrong.

There are ways to prevent girls from reproducing, and ways for preventing "would be" fathers from indulging. Make it where a poor male can't engage in the act until he can prove his worth, and watch em run get a job and save his money.

This is not cruel, cruel is being poor and having a baby that will be poor.

Prove you have money or ability to provide for a kid before you are allowed to "engage".......

Ps. This guy who wrote this thinks we need to just give out condems... "they're gonna do it anyway, right"?

Why not give out drugs, they're gonna do that too right? Idiot government worker.
2204rob
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December 01, 2012
I could not agree more. Since my arrival here 17 years ago, it has been obvious that the teen pregnancy rate is a predominant cause of this county's continued prevalent poverty rate. It is VITAL that the school system take a more active role. It would be better if the parents would do it, but the the fact is, by the time some of these kids are 13 or 14, their moms aren't even 30 themselves. Further, most kids follow the examples of their parents (good or bad) and will perpetuate the problem with each new generation.

Sex education SHOULD be in the domain of the home, but as long as the repercussions are financed by the public sector (taxpayers), then the public sector (including the schools) should be active in the prevention of teen pregnancy and the many ruined lives it causes.
DaveD
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December 01, 2012
People like you not only scare me, you anger me. Yes, teen pregnancy is a problem, but it IS an issue for the family with which to deal. I do not want the schools, or any other government entity, raising my child.

It's sad that many parents here in Robeson county aren't doing their jobs, but many are. If the school system wants to offer a program on sex education that is voluntary with parental consent, I'd have no problem with that. I'm one of those taxpayers, too, and those of us against this being taught in public schools should also have a say. But people like you and the author of this piece, who want more government involved in people's lives, are what's ailing America. Stop pushing your liberal agendas on those of us who are responsible and keep government out of my life.
orighawk
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December 01, 2012
Hows this for perpetuating a cycle? I know a guy who was a grandfather by 30, has at least four or 5 kids by 3 different women with another ex hooker pregnant now...he works cash jobs part time so you know who is supporting this crowd? We the taxpayers...
ROSSisRIGHT
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December 02, 2012
orighawk: You just described the average Robesonian.... You must not be from around here.

Welcome to our lovely county.

Most parents around here don't know how to care for their kids. They say they love them but their actions show they don't. The single parent is still clubbing along side of their pregnant teenage daughter....... Then everybody lives miserably on welfare and section-8 for the rest of their pathetic lives. They wake up mad at the world and jelous of others who have made something of their lives. I laugh at them when I see em in public. If I see some teenage pregnant girl who looks like she's on welfare, I won't even hold the door open for her... And believe me, I'm a perfect gentleman, but not to these parasites. They've ruined the beauty of pregnancy.